Orientação Vocacional: Meus filhos devem seguir meus passos?
by Maria Beatriz Lobo - junho 3rd, 2011.Filed under: Assuntos Gerais e Atualidades, Educação em Geral e Ensino Superior, Mundo do Trabalho, Mundo social e político, Relacionamentos e família. Tagged as: como escolher uma profissão, Escolha profissional: Estudar para carreiras que dão dinheiro? Como orientar o futuro dos filhos? Orientação Vocacional, felicidade ou sucesso financeiro, liberdade de escolha, Orientação profissional, os pais devem impor uma profissão aos filhos, por que os pais querem que os filhos sigam seus passos, vocação ou ganhar dinheiro?.
O que meu filho (ou filha) vai ser quando crescer?
Quem já não respondeu ou pretende responder a essa pergunta? E quantos de nós insistimos em acreditar que são os pais os mais capacitados a auxiliar os filhos nessa difícil decisão?
Talvez essa questão estivesse melhor colocada em revistas de psicologia, mas quando pensamos no imenso número de empresas familiares e na grande expectativa que os adultos geralmente possuem em ver seus filhos como seus herdeiros ou sucessores profissionais, podemos calcular o impacto que essas decisões podem causar nas empresas e na vida das famílias.
Melhor do que pensar que isso é um problema de orientação vocacional seria gastarmos um pouco de tempo para entendermos que a escolha da profissão é, com certeza, se não a maior, uma das mais importantes decisões na relação tempo / investimento que as pessoas fazem e aquela que afeta, de forma contundente, muitas das outras que tomamos ao longo da vida.
Não quero tratar da questão da profissão em si, ou se suas características vêm mudando ao longo do desenvolvimento da sociedade, mas quero falar da busca pela felicidade, pois, afinal, é disso que tratamos quando orientamos ou ocultamos nossos desejos em relação a esse aspecto da vida dos que nos são caros.
A escolha da área ou da forma como queremos desenvolver nossas habilidades e gostos, aquilo que muitos chamam de vocação, pode se materializar ao longo do tempo como uma coisa natural e consequente, mas pode ser também uma angústia para pais e adolescentes desavisados que se desesperam ao querer conciliar aptidão, vocação e possíveis vantagens competitivas, sociais ou financeiras, que cada atividade ou profissão pode possuir.
É aí que o conflito surge na maioria das vezes, pois nem sempre o que gostamos é aquilo para o qual possuímos as aptidões necessárias e, mais ainda, podemos possuir ambas, vocação e aptidão, e não reunir condições materiais para alcançar nossos objetivos.
Não é difícil encontrar vocacionados para a medicina que não conseguem financiar seus estudos ou passar pelo funil dos concorridos vestibulares, ou jovens que querem cursar oceanografia e residem no meio do sertão, ou, ainda, adoradores do basquete que não ultrapassaram a barreira do metro e meio de altura.
É preciso que se orientem os jovens a analisar seus potenciais e suas reais condições de enfrentar os desafios da atividade desejada, a buscar informações técnicas sobre as exigências, formação e mercado da área escolhida ou de interesse, encaminhá-los às discussões com profissionais satisfeitos e insatisfeitos com o seu exercício profissional e, acima de tudo, não impor aos filhos ou jovens amarras que nossos sonhos e nossos preconceitos podem impor.
A missão de nosso filho não é continuar a nossa obra. A luta que deve ser travada é por sua felicidade, onde o prazer de se fazer o que se gosta deve ser muito mais importante e, geralmente, muito mais promissor do que aquilo que dá dinheiro ou é reconhecido socialmente.
Quando esperamos que eles se “casem bem”, na verdade queremos que eles escolham o que pode fazê-los feliz, mas não podemos imaginar que somos nós quem devemos nos apaixonar, ou mesmo escolher a pessoa no lugar deles.
Não devemos nos furtar a procurar ajuda profissional quando isso já se transformou em um problema que desgasta pelo menos parte da família, mas os testes e exercícios psicológicos somente devem ser considerados como indicadores e orientadores sobre a vocação das pessoas.
Para não dizer que não falei de flores, aí vai uma sugestão para aqueles que estão enfrentando a dúvida cruel da escolha ou da vontade de mudança profissional: feche os olhos em local tranquilo e isolado e imagine sua vida daqui a dez anos. Pense na sua casa, em seu companheiro ou esposa, imagine seus filhos e seu dia a dia na profissão escolhida.
Esmere-se para ser o mais realista possível, e se, ao abrir os olhos, essa ideia lhe parecer agradável e viável, acredito que você esteja no caminho certo.
Este artigo tem o título original de “Vocação para Felicidade” foi adaptado e publicado no Canal de Gestão da Escola (Portal KlickEducação) e inserido no site da Lobo & Associados em 02/2000
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